I Am Diseased
Place me under quarantine

The day after I got back from my camping trip, I found a little tick parasiting itself upon me. It was much smaller than any other tick I've found on me (wood tick), and looked a little different. I diligently Googled on how to extract it from my skin. I learned that you are NOT to use rubbing alcohol or petroleum jelly, or burn it off with a match. Instead, you're supposed to use tweezers and grab it closest to it's head as possible and slowly pull until it releases itself from your skin. I'm not sure I was patient enough, but I don't think I left the head inside me (ewwww). Then I went about trying to figure out what kind of tick it was, hoping it wasn't a deer tick because I'd rather not get lyme disease, thank you very much. The problem was, I really needed a magnifying glass and I didn't have one. But I don't think it was a deer tick because it has reddish legs and a reddish head. Deer ticks have black legs, apparently. I think it may have been a dog tick?? Anyway, I'm now on the look-out for a bulls-eye shaped rash.

A few days ago a weird rash thing sprung up on one of my fingers. It's really small and doesn't bother me too much comfort-wise, but it bothers me because I'd like to know what it is. I think it might be a very mild case of poison ivy/sumac. I remember gathering kindling from the woods one day while camping and noticing that my hands were itching/bothering me. Brighton immediately had me wash my hands with soap and water. So maybe that was it. If so, I'm glad you had me wash my hands right away, Brighton, or else it might be much worse! Up until now, I've never had poison ivy. And maybe this isn't poison ivy. I don't know. I tried taking a picture of it, but it wasn't coming out well. There's also a few lone occasionally itchy rash-like dots on my other hand (around my knuckles) as well.

Speidi. WTF.

Until today, I've successfully avoided anything about Speidi aside from the occasional photo where I always say, "Who are these people?" I'd never heard them speak a word. I wish I could still say that. I just watched an online video about Al Roker interviewing them, their time on that show I'm a Celebrity, Get Me Out Of Here, and then a video where they respond to Al's "treatment" of them on the Today Show. Words cannot express how much I can't stand them. OMG. I hope to go back to completely ignoring them from here on out. But it might be hard, because they're like a goddamn trainwreck.

More Fun With Photoshop!

Warning: Image Heavy!

It was Riley's 4th birthday on June 4th (her golden birthday). I made her a book for her birthday. The story/writing is pretty lame, but I was quite proud of the "illustrations" I made. I use the term illustration loosely, since I didn't actually draw anything...I just Photoshopped pictures. But, in case you want to spend a few minutes reading a children's book, here it is--provided here, exclusively for you, dear readers (well, aside from the hard copy I sent to Riley). (Perhaps it should be explained that the pink giraffe is her favorite toy...and she named him Key)

I Love the 80s
And pipe wrenches

Because I'm apparently obsessed and don't think people are capable of finding things on their own, I am embedding another Literal Music Video here. And for my own reference, since I honestly can watch these multiple times. If I was funny enough and had the means to do it, I'd totally want to do one of these myself.

Take on Me: Literal Video Version - watch more funny videos

Literal Music Videos

Apparently these aren't very new, but I've never seen them. Very funny. Basically, changing the lyrics of songs to match what's (literally) happening in the music video. My favorites are:

Tears For Fears, "Head Over Heels" Literal Version
I had no idea that this was the video. Haha! Ridiculous.


Red Hot Chili Peppers, "Under the Bridge" Literal Version


Bonnie Tyler, "Total Eclipse of the Heart" Literal Version